the lies are falling from your eyes in little streams down your cheeks....little pools of deception staining your shirt
its not my heart you fool but your own..the smile on my face hides the laughter in my head and my gritted teeth stop the bellows from leaving my heart

Amazing

I suppose one could argue that I am ignorant simple because I'm constantly shocked by the ignorant actions of others.  It really is amazing.

Bubbleigh Morgue

Your emotional outbursts are entertaining...truly.  And my stoicism elevates you to a higher level of psychosis.  Feed your need darlin.  Let your hands tremble and fumble over words, spit from your mouth turning to sparkles as they catch the sunlight...so many different ways to say the same thing, all trying to dance off your tongue at the same time.  I'm a bane of your existence....a wretched horrible vulgar heartless thing. 
Could you possibly know that I've fought this battle before?  Yes, we've met.  In other faces, in other chapters of my life....we've met.  You are nothing significant.  Nothing new or original.  The same abuser.  The same intoxicated sharp tongue.  Your anger stems from a frustration at your inability to control me...aggravating, no? Haha!  Know how this battle is won? Shhhhhh, I'll whisper it to you....I've already forgotten about you....and you? You'll continue to brew your anger and you'll remember my name ; )

and this?

i beg of you merciful death, let your cold hand find me in this unending darkness....find me here sobbing in this bed of self pity. i long to feel nothing. i long for the touch of your withered fingers upon my eyes. close them. allow me to slip away into an empty dream. an empty lifeless dream.
the pain is unbearable.  my deniability is lost and my dignity is a distant memory.  a time when i walked so proud....the earth was beneath my feet, -that- i was confident of...no need to stare at them while i walked down streets with hope and pride...but now i stare, because i'm not so sure where my steps will land. if they will land.  i hang my head because i fear catching the eye of another, and having them see the weakness in me...what would they care beyond that moment of a passing glimpse really?  who cares anyway.
oh i'm so exhausted. this race is a tiresome one that has lead no where...and we all rush through it...to what end? here and now.  sooner or later we all lay here, begging for the mercy of nothingness. bring it to me now and spare me the agonizing drone of passing time...

When

When it is morally praiseworthy but not morally obligatory.

The Very Truth

The very truth of the matter is that I'm afraid to fail.  I've come so close now...but the "what if's" have gotten a hold of me.  What if  I bomb the MCATS? What if my financing falls out? What if they actually accept me? What if I'm away from my family far more than I could have imagined? What if they say I'm not good enough.....what if i fail.
I know nothing will change until I decide to change it.  I will continue to feel restricted and frustrated. 
I'll shoot for this moon....

With Hands at Your Sides

Yes.  Thats exactly how they want you to stand after they slap you in the face....and be thankful.  "It could be worse" is what we tell ourselves when it is so hard to endure the now.  Remembering and living in a time that was then...such a sobering realization discovering you are only loving a memory.